Well if Finns are such a nice lot of half-eskimos, how about dating one? In general, how do Finns relate to dating and (ahem) all things involved in it? Approaching this touchy subject is a delicate issue, but as we’ve seen on previous chapters we can already begin to form a general picture about them.
Although we have – as everyone has – had a long tradition in the previous centuries being devoted and marrying only once, the western lifestyle has had it’s effect on us in this one. The older “He is Mr. Right for me” -type of thinking has changed into “Well he might be Mr. Right, but maybe not, I guess I should give him a try and if I don’t like it, I’ll find another Mr. Right” -type of thinking in the 1980’s. Dating is, thus, very typical and a common habit.
Finns usually start dating at an early age, typical first girl/boyfriends are of course schoolmates and such. This fact combined with the liberal attitude towards alcohol usually leads to school parties being quite hilarious french kissing-competitions. And it usually leads to… Well, it does. And it does so generally in an early age.
So frankly speaking Finns have a rather easy approach to sex, in general.
This is another advantage/disadvantage of the typical Finnish liberalistic attitude to everything. To some it might seem that Finns live a valueless life behaving like this, getting to know this side of the human nature in such a careless manner. But it’s the by-product of the modern age, people thinking freely will give more and more allowances to their children and so on. Also, religion does not play as important a part in Finland as it does in several other countries: This attributes towards liberal approach, as well.
That matter handled, how do Finns actually do as girl/boyfriends? Usually – and unfortunately – this question is a materialistic one, concentrating on the idea about a blonde eskimo-type of guy/girl from a tiny exotic country, but this not of course the idea of this text.
As we know, Finns are a curious mixture of tradition, free thinking, education, harsh conditions and sexual liberalism. This combined with the fact that we’re used to equality in almost everything (well, at least nearly equal) between men and women, relationships nowadays are rarely traditional (“Me man. You woman. Make food or I’ll stop giving you money for shopping”) types, but rather conversation- and opinion-centric as well as volatile ones (“Will you make food or shall I do it today and make a tick in the “I made food today” -list honey?”).
So is everything hunkeydorey then? If we are so used to everything and on top of all already mentioned are so sexually liberated, we should make excellent lovers/husbands/wives, yes? In other words, let’s see the bad sides, which you’ve all been waiting for.
Finland is a tiny country centered on itself and it’s own growth. Thus Finns can be awfully egosentric, always looking at things on the basis of “back home it’s never like this” -type of way. But by far the worst part is tradition of not showing one’s emotions openly. Typically (and very, very generally) Finns are sullen, inwards-turned individuals who might have serious difficulties in expressing their feelings openly. Except hate, which is expressed openly, of course as it’s easier than the rest. But feelings of love and caring usually tend to get buried under the surface. And once you’ve got a Finn going on about talking his or her feelings, he/she is usually quite straightforward about it (“I told you once that I love you, don’t you remember?”) or too relieved to be tolerated once they begin (“I love you I love you I love you. I love you. I do. Love you.”.)
On top of all this, Finns might have some trouble in feelings in general. After all, some of us still believe that ANY feelings shouldn’t be expressed openly, and for instance boys are still taught (in some families) not to ever cry and so on. This is commonly thought to be the (at least partly) reason for stress and such, as people at have difficulties in expressing their emotions in any way and thus become depressed. And – as the sugar on top – this problem with emotions is usually tried to be overcome with alcohol (“Rheally, I just lhove you. You’re lhike a bhrother to me.”)
But no need to be sad! A lovable, egomanic, troublesome, sexually liberated and anxiety-prone Finn in your life can make things interesting, when you add all this up. Really, it can. Try some.